Handicapped

That's right.  Last night's golf date is going to make it official, I'm now handicapped. 

For those of you who aren't golfers (or bowlers for that matter!) a handicap is a number of basically "gimme" shots that helps level the playing field when good players are paired up against not so good players. I am bad. My handicap is high! Andy told me this morning that I have the highest handicap he's ever seen. Pffft! But at least I have one now. It takes several rounds of golf to establish your handicap, and now I'm officially there.

People, this might not seem like anything to you, but in this house, it's a SERIOUS BIG DEAL.  Like a Hell Has Officially Frozen Over in the Sweltering 90 Freaking Degree Heat and Obnoxious Cincinnati Humidity Big Deal. 

Andy loves to play golf, he always has. Since before we were married ~ approximately the last 20 years ~ he has wanted nothing more than to get his ESPN-loving, sports-obsessed jock wife out on the golf course with him. He never even cared if I was any good, he has just always hoped that it was something that we could enjoy together, amidst the green fairways and mature oak trees. 

As that life long jock, I saw it a bit differently. I've been fortunate. For most of my life, athletic pursuits have come fairly easily for me. I was a good junior tennis player and played in college. I can't dribble a basketball to save my life, but I've always managed to pick other sports up rather easily. I have played softball, soccer, volleyball, and ran track. I have played in a men's broomball hockey league. If they would have had hockey and lacrosse programs for women when I was younger, I would have been totally into those! I like crazy, black diamond ski runs on some of the biggest mountains in the world, and I'm a second degree black belt in taekwondo. I like to think that I'm aggressive and fearless, but probably I'm just foolish. Oh yeah, and I've always been crazy competitive. I want to be number one or nothing. Put all those things together and I'm not a good fit for golf.  Golf takes patience, golf takes a lot of practice, and golf takes a lot of time (the time thing is a big deal for a busy chick!). 

Early in our marriage, we'd go golfing and as a beginner my expectations were way too high. I wanted to be good and "play with the big guys" right away. Obviously that wasn't happening. Andy always said that if I put any effort into practicing and actually improving my game, that I could be a really good player. The problem was, I wasn't willing to do that. I really wanted to be good RIGHT AWAY. Of course, that didn't happen (imagine that!), so eventually, when it wasn't fun for me, I got too frustrated and gave up. I quit playing and hadn't played in about 15 years. My clubs got rusty and spiders took up residence in my neglected early 90's style turquoise and hot pink golf bag. 

Fast forward to early 2010. We joined a local nearby golf club last November. The price was right, allowing Andy to golf as much as he basically wanted at a decent price, and gave Shannon a place to start working on her game. There are clay tennis courts (which I have always loved!), a workout room, and a lovely pool, all about 7 minutes from home. It was a good fit for our family. And then in the early spring, we were notified of a fun, couples' league that was forming for the summer. League organizers claimed that it was social and not competitive and frankly it sounded like fun. So I proposed that we sign up and join. Andy thought that aliens had kidnapped me, because he had totally given up on the idea that I'd ever pick up a club again. But I did. And this time, it's totally different.

I borrowed Shannon's clubs in the spring and haven't looked back since. This time, I just want to enjoy playing and see some steady improvement. I have ditched that "wanna be number one and on top immediately" thing. I figure as long as I'm not holding anybody behind me up (and I don't), I'm fine. Certainly if I don't care that I'm bad, nobody else is going to care either. That was a real revelation. Yet much to my surprise, I'm improving every week. While my handicap might be the highest that Andy's ever seen, it's going down every week. We're having fun playing together, I'm making new friends at the club, and other women have actually invited me to play with them. Go figure! I might even play in the ladies' leagues next season and that's something that this crazy competitive chick would have never even considered in the past. 

So never say never. I truly believed that I'd never pick up a golf club and now here I am. Bobby Jones once said that golf is a game played on a five inch course, the distance between your ears. I am living proof of that. I am now officially a golfer, albeit a bad one.  Can I get a handicapped sticker for my car now?

Comments

[Pam]

Barb, if it makes you feel any better I have a handicap for mini golf! I can't even hit a ball off the tee!

[Creative Junkie]

Good for you, Barb!

I grew up playing golf - played almost every day in the summer for years. But the older I got, the bigger my boobs got and man, it's hard to address the ball when you can't even see it for the DDDs on your chest - kwim? Let's not even get into boob sweat or the stress of traipsing into sand and water and Vietnam to find a wayward ball.

Nate loves to golf and wants me to join him but ugh, I just can't anymore.

[Jan C.]

lol, Barb, if I ever tried golf I think I'd be right there with you in the Outerspace Club as far as handicaps go. Glad you ditched your perfectionist tendencies when it comes to sports and are just enjoying getting out on the course and improving. I'm sure you'll be so much better by this time next year that you'll laugh when you look back on this post.

[Jen Martakis]

You make me smile Barb. :) :) :)

[Mary Jo]

Love your golf story ;) Congratulations on officially becoming a golfer! I need to learn (ahem, we live on a golf course and I've never played) sssshhhhhh ;)
Let us know how you're doing and if we'll see you on tour soon! =)